Notes from the Aboveground

A couple of interesting notes:

1) About getting in the groove. It could be that the healing, the deep connectedness we crave is not something that we'll have to re-order and re-invent our lives to enjoy but something very radically distinct very close by.

I have had many experiences where an "issue" that I thought was the result of some deep, dark, childhood something required nothing but a slight shift in perspective. And a desire to let go of any "bogymen" in the equation and to also admit my true feelings/get a life.

This would fit the description "right under our nose". We are sophisticated people, adn are likely on to the finer distinctions in life. Meaning that increasingly smaller adjustments would produce increasingly pleasing results.

2) I'm starting to think that one of the primary features of a quantum way of life is it's totality. That you have to commit wholeheartedly. And joyously. Believe all the way. Pull that last foot forward and toe the line with a deep belief.

3) I'm starting to find that things that require my control and work when I set out to control and work. And that things requiring less from me but being more beneficial to me result when I stay within myself.

That staying within myself ALLOWS things to come to me.

A great example of this would be another person. It's hard to be friends with someone who is deeply insecure, because they can't really believe you. It's also hard to be in love or attracted to someone who is needy. The line on the street is that we are much more likely to be attracted to jerks and jerkettes.

Is this because we crave pain? Not necessarily. There is something wonderful about a person who is confident enough that going off and doing what you want to do--or getting very, very close won't phase them.

Some people come to this point by shutting people out or being unavailable but that doesn't diminish the attractiveness of whatever sense of self they have been able to put together. If it is ego based it will be unattractive soon enough, but there are plenty of ways to be confident and self-assured without being annoying.

In fact, I would say that the more truly confident you are, the less you need your ego to hide behind.

To apply this, it may be true that the world wants to help those who help themselves. Or that we find those who don't need money, partners, or business opportunities the most attractive for just those things. There's also some power in being hungry, but that may be a secondary characteristic. Or one of the old world(?). (I haven't thought about it.)

Interesting because I've usually been of the mind that to find you have to be out searching. But the bible says ask and you shall receive. It doesn't say get wound up and go out searching. Although that's certainly one way of asking.

I can see this so many places. It still feels odd to give myself whatever feeling I want and the act as if I already have it. I'm used to getting even more hungry--starved even--to gear myself up to make something happen. To imagine that nothing will ever happen unless I...

And this has certainly garnered results (from the French Gagner meaning to win or earn). But, as I've been talking about, what if those results are only coming after I go through enough toil that I no longer give a rat's backside?

What if the PANIC that seems to keep the economy percolating happily is a false indicator, and instead of getting us motivated and careful is actually messing up our productivity. And the results that we think take a week, or a day or two years, actually take much less--the difference being the amount of time it takes us to overcome our own fear?

As I've mentioned before here I've gotten my largest breaks when sporting some of my largest IDGAF (that's I don't give a f@$* as translated by my friend Darren) attitude. And lost some of my largest gains when beaten into submission and "customer servicing"/cowering my way along.

I should also mention that the gains came when I had it truly, not when I was being a jerk--just asserting myself and politely "take it or leave it" taking no shorts. Even if I wasn't necessarily qualified.

And my losses weren't when I was necessarily being my most "nice", although I was probably trying. But when I had given up--and was probably being somewhat of a bi-otch as a passive way to get a little ego something out of the relationship.

Another interesting note: I've been writing more on this blog recently and have been getting more hits--but not on the pages that I've been writing.