Is You Is or Is You Ain't...

I've said it before and I'll say it again--if you're not sick and tired of being sick and tired, then we probably don't have much to mess around with.

Jesus said the same thing, but of course if I mention this then I'm arrogant.

But it's true.

If you think everything's cool. Then go be cool with it. And tell me how to live. I've been looking for you my whole life.

If you think that all you need is that next promotion, that next pair of shoes, that bigger house, plasma TV, to fuck those two (or ten) women.

If that's gonna work for you then go do it. Tell me how it works and I'll buy your shit.

If you, like I was, were raised liberal and nice, then you've accepted from the start that the world was messed up. Why is it so threatening when I say that it's fucked up because we're fucked up?

I don't say it to make anyone wrong. Honestly. Anyone who's happy and content (or even or content), please continue on (the phrase my bike messengering dispatcher used to say when he didn't have anything for you. Could be a blessing, could be a slap in the face. Either way there was no chance I was happy--nor would I pretend I was).

If we don't admit we're broken, ain't no way we can get whole. That's the whole deal. I'm not trying to be in charge of shit, but I'm not going to give up on what I learned just because nice white society doesn't like it. God bless you, I love that you're doing what you want and how you want to do it--because I wanna do the exact same thing.

That doesn't mean I believe you, though. History will show us who's right and I look forward to being humbled either way if that's god's will.

In the meantime I don't see any other way that things are going to work for the 10 (12?) year-old boy on front of Newsweek wearing black, and a scull and cross-bones. I tried it all. And none of it worked for me. And I love him enough to respect his inteligence. He knows that he's being raised into bullshit, to do bullshit. That he's being taught largely bullshit. It doesn't mean it's wrong, Or that he couldn't surive and get by and find moments of joy in his life. It's just not going to work. He's not going to live like he could unless he has a whole different world to grow up into. That's what I know. Because that was me. And I wasn't even wearing black. Probably had more money and more access too.

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